Rules for Guinness

Posted by Thinking In Vain at 3/16/2007 09:11:00 AM

Provided to me by my friend Gary when I told him I'd never had Guinness:

1. If a pub has guinness on tap, and they fill the glass to the top in one pull, find a new pub (they are serving you muddy water)

2. If a pub has guinness on tap, and they don't have to let the pint settle for at least 2 or 3 minutes, find a new pub (the guinness is watered down)

3. If a pub doesn't have guinness on tap, but has the draught bottles or cans, make sure the bartender pours the guinness IMMEDIATELY after opening said bottle or can.

4. If a pub doesn't have guinness on tap, and doesn't have the draught cans/bottles, but has the extra stout, compliment them on their good taste.

5. If a pub doesn't have guinness on tap, and doesn't have the draught cans/bottles, and doesn't have the extra stout, take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself why you are there in the first place.

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6 comments:

  1. Jetpacks said... March 16, 2007 at 9:39 AM

    If a beer requires this many rules, it was probably never finished at the brewery.

    And thanks for that jingle stuck in my head below, (comments are disabled I guess.) From the Easterns website, it looks like it was the winner of a contest to "make the next Easterns jingle."

  2. Thinking In Vain said... March 16, 2007 at 9:43 AM

    I think I'd need a laminated index card... you shouldn't need that for beer.

    Your welcome. :)

  3. Anonymous said... March 4, 2009 at 4:59 PM

    Guinness is Irish, not English...

  4. Anonymous said... May 27, 2009 at 11:53 PM

    yeah who ever put something brit related above guinness should be shot

  5. Thinking In Vain said... May 28, 2009 at 8:31 AM

    Oh good lord. Aren't you two full of yourselves?

    I believe the image I found originally was an English ad for Guinness... I don't think anyone is going to get confused because of one old (classic) ad.

    The image has nothing to do with the post except that it is a Guinness ad.

  6. Anonymous said... November 3, 2009 at 12:25 PM

    If you don’t think this much when it comes to beer, go buy some Budweiser and leave the real beer to the professionals.

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